Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Monkee Davy Jones, 66, has died. Let's look at the last ads he did.


(click ads, from a 2007 issue of Investor's Business Daily)
Many Baby Boomers right now are fondly remembering their favorite fake Monkees song, sung by Jones. This isn't a music blog, though, it's an ad blog. So, let's—maybe not as fondly—remember these ads Davy did for online stock picker Gorilla Trades. He also did a couple of :15 spots for them. RIP, Believer.

Look at them goofy Injuns! (vintage racist ad).

(click)
"Heap big power..."
That's no (sitting) bull! (sorry). See 29 more vintage racist ads on Buzzfeed. Also: see this 1951 Ethyl ad, one of the most bizarre ads I've ever seen.

Russian tourism video is a pleasant surprise.


(via)
It's a nice, simple to way show a lot of country quickly, and entertainingly. I watched it a second time, and liked it even more. The guy's a bit annoying to me, but then, as many of you know, most people are annoying to me.
Ad agency: Bureau Working Title, Moscow.
Previous tourism ads: North Dakota (terrible) • Switzerland (insane) • and Las Vegas (headline: Are You A Douchebag?).

BEER FOR (moronic) MEN ONLY (print ads).


(click ads, via) That's what the ad agency press note said about 13% alcohol Helldorado beer—"For Men Only". You got that, bitches—YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE BEER. No, it's for macho simpletons like depicted in the above canvases titled, "the fine art of being a man". Yes. Quite. Ad agency: CCZ, Curitiba, Brazil.
Three previous stupid, sexist beer campaigns here.

Grandma has an important message for all you cool guy designers:

(click)
Yes, she's back, with more social media/technology tips. Previously in: graphic designers are pathetic.

UK Furniture retailer banned from using catchphrase "Sofa King Low".

(click, via)
This is Sofa King Lame.
After using the line for nine (9) fucking years, Northampton's Sofa King has been reprimanded by the ASA, because, "[the ad] could be interpreted as a derivative of the swear word 'fuck', which consumer research had found to be a word so likely to offend that it should not be used in ads at all, even when it was relevant to the name of a product..."
They probably got a complaint from somebody "important"—like that dicksplash David Cameron.
Here's six more amusing ASA ad bans.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

WTF Ad of the Week.

(click, via)
What the fuck am I looking at?
That's how you're selling yourselves, Quebec Institute of Graphic Communications?
A mermaid in a Montreal Canadiens sweater?
Obviously, Quebec Nordiques fans.
Printing is DYING. Face it, fuckfaces.
Molson boys, sue the fuck out of these fake French assholes.
Ad agency: Taxi, Montreal.
As always, Fuck you fat-assed Bruins fans!

OK, here's an ad I like.

(click)
I'm busy working on actual work today, so here's an ad from 2008 for Tipp-Ex correction fluid (the client is actually cna stores). How bout that: a product hero ad where the product is, in fact, the hero. The asshole client is happy, and the whiny creatives are happy. That's rare. Ad agency: Jupiter Drawing Room.
Related: in 2010, Tipp-Ex did one of the smartest YouTube ads I've seen.

Spotted in Brooklyn: Phil Collinsssssssssssss.

(click, on Greenpoint Ave., via New York Shitty)
I guess this is leftover from the massively ironic Phil Collins Day. Previously: "Chucky" on sale in Brooklyn for $1,000.

Minimalistic "Moneyball" poster will get stat nerds hard.

(click)
As a Mariners fan, I watched, in disbelieving horror, as those shitty A's teams somehow blew past the M's to win division crowns. As a Strat-O-Matic baseball junkie for many years, this poster touches me in that special, innocent boyhood place. The movie was pretty damn good, despite the awful Brad Pitt casting. You can buy the poster here. Related: a post of baseball ads.

Monday, February 27, 2012

Hayley Wade is running for Vice President Student Life. This is her men's room campaign poster.

(click)
At the University of Calgary, according to this redditor. It is real, not Photoshopped, apparently. That is dirty politics. Her opponent doesn't stand a chance.

DAT POLYESTER ASS (1977).

(click, via sighs and whispers)
From a 1977 Playgirl.
Previously: After Six put the "yes" in Polyester.
Previously: The 1960s Broomsticks Polyester pants Gang Rape Ad Series™.

What do you think? I think the second "BUSTY" is overkill.

I think she may be trying to overcompensate for some other shortcoming. Snapped in Finsbury Park, London, by Supastruct.

OMFG! The new "Mad Men" poster is here!!!!!!!!!!

(click, via)
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
DON DRAPER LIKES NIPPLE-LESS BOOBIES.
(he'd like this woman)
Previous Mad Men posters here and here.
update: WRONG type of mannequin for the period, dipshit Matthew Weiner.

What's going on in this photo from American Apparel's website?

(via)
• Black man with a white woman's hand in his pocket?
• Black man in the middle of skin whitening treatment?
• White man who only put sunblock on his arms?
• A MASSIVE Photoshop Phuck-up?
Previous Phasion Photoshop Phuck-up.
update: NOT a Photoshop Disaster (see comments).

Is this the most annoying invention in the history of advertising?

(click, via I Don't Heart LA)The quivering, shaking inflatable man. Shudder.

Writers! Time to judge a "clever" long copy ad.

(click, via)
This ad for book and films shop Papercut was written by DDB Stockholm copywriter Magnus Jakobsson. He writes all the Papercut ads, and he writes them in this...breaking the 4th wall (or is it the 3rd or 5th wall?) style. I've mocked two of his previous Papercut ads (here and here). Unlike me, Magnus is thick-skinned and good-natured, and took my mostly fake-harsh words well. (here's his reply.) So: what do you wordsmithies think?

This ad for the "Dog Whisperer" confuses me a bit.

(click, via)
Is "Daisy" supposed to be a gay male dog? Or a butch gay female dog? Or... maybe he/she is somewhere in the pre- post-op stages? I ask, because "Daisy" doesn't seem to have the right equipment. Is it under his leg? Photoshopped out? Thoughts?
Ad agency: Ireland Davenport, Johannesburg. Previous cute dog ads: onetwothree.

Sexy Stock Photo of the Day.

(click, via)
This is perfect: me and my AD are working on a campaign for a fast copier.
Headline: THE FASTEST FUCKING COPIER IN THE WORLD.
It's a Japanese copier, so I'm worried about that exclusive usage restriction.
(fingers crossed they buy it)
Previous Corny, Porny Stock Photo of the Day.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Funny GIF of the Day for Word Nerds.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
Yes, it's the pangram "the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog".
Previous mesmerizing GIFs of the Day:
Inception Cat.
The Jesus.
Sexy Santorum.

One of the most creative interactive ambient ads ever produced.

(click)
I never posted this amazing mall installation on copyranter, but wrote about it back in March, 2009 on Animal NY. Yes, this was a real 225 square meter sticker promoting Frontline flea and tick spray that was placed on the main floor of three shopping malls in Jakarta, Indonesia. Brilliant.
Ad agency: Saatchi & Saatchi, Jakarta.
For lots more Ad Creep ads, creep here.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Funny as fuck travel site commercial.


Unethical? I don't care.
It has the feel of the late 1980s-early1990s funny spots.
Will it work for Kayak?
I don't know. Again, I don't care.
Ad agency: Barton F. Graf 9000, NYC.
Previously: four bad travel ads.

Creepy "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks of the Day.

(click via) "Fun" in "clown" means "pederast". And, what the fuck is "COCO" doing with his hands? This, however, is still the creepiest "unnecessary" quotation marks example ever.

Here's a not-terrible new UK McDonald's commercial.


Sure, it's not brilliant.
And the guy-girl subplot was forced.
But, it's much better than the shite USA advertising.
Ad agency: Leo Burnett, London.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Vintage Sexist Ad Watch: the Cigar Institute of America, 1962.

(click, via)
Maybe it's his cigar smoke that's making her cry? From a 1962 issue of Playboy. The headline is a quote from Edward Bulwer-Lytton, the Brit politician and writer who coined, "The Great Unwashed" and other popular modern catch-phrases. Compare the ad to this—maybe more sexist, maybe less—Cigar Institute ad from 1959.

Brilliantly misleading Brooklyn sidewalk beer ad.

(click, via Buzzfeed)
In cutesy Park Slope. If this was in say, Red Hook or Bensonhurst, the establishment would be at serious risk of being torched. Related: Here's a previous funny "free beer" ad.

The goddamn cutest anteater ads ever.


(click, via)
Thank God it's goddamn Friday. OK, yes, they're the only anteater ads I've ever seen, but your argument is invalid. They're for a cool, new arrival at the Cologne Zoo. I only wish the words were FUCK and SHIT, or even worse.
Ad agency: Preuss und Preuss, Berlin.
Previous cool zoo ads: Amsterdam Zoo (promoting an animal baby boom)• Copenhagen Z00 (snake on a bus!) • Perth Zoo (artistic elephants).

Mohamed Atta shows up in facebook car insurance ad.

(click)
Ha. He's in heaven, not driving, but flying on Virgin Air.
No worries about a lawsuit. Via.

She's gotta lotta nuts in her mouth (print ad).

(click, via)
Also, the porn stars. And, this baby (nsfw). Via Dothan, AL, famous for their national peanut festival. Previously: Douchebag facebook loser Winklevoss twins selling pistachio nuts.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

The best "Success Kid" meme execution yet.

(via)
I can't remember the last time I had this "success". Fucking IBS. Also, touché to the writer, understanding the power of the perfect short headline.

Asian angel Steve Jobs impersonator in-store display.

(click, via reddit)
The turtleneck lives.
He is Taiwanese comedian A-Ken. Selling the Action Pad. Which runs Android. Bwa. Ha. Apple's gotta be all over this, legally. Here's his TV spot. Related: Zombie Steve Jobs.

"Yo Mama" jokes for Graphic Designers.

(click, via)
So, so not funny. Previously in:
Graphic Designers are pathetic.

Copywriters! What do you think of this National Geographic ad?

(click)
Some fascinating information here. I doubt the veracity of some of it (especially the remote quip). The ad doesn't make me want to watch the National Geographic Channel. It makes me kinda hate myself (more). Jerks. What do you think? It's definitely translated from another language, doubt if it's real.
Previously: Aliens laughing at our oil spills in Nat Geo Kids ad.

Did you see this story?

For you quickly aging Gen Xers.
Via the evil, evil Bad Cocaine.
Related: Geezer Jock magazine.

Here you will see an ad with handcuffs made out of beer.

(click, via)
For the Utah Department of Highway Safety.
*Homer drool sf/x*..."tasty incarcerated goodness."
Ad is trying desperately to be clever.
Can you taste the desperation?
Ad agency: R&R Partners, Salt Lake City.
Related:
four anti-drunk driving videos—2 good, 2 bad.

FOUND! The only black, female advertising creative in America.


(via)
Though, I do like the spot, my favorite in the new campaign promoting the upcoming Dallas ADDYs (Not my favorite: this one, featuring a typical whiny bitch of a copywriter.) Olde Skool ideas. Know anything about them, digital jockeys?

Sexy Rick Santorum GIF of the Day.

Photobucket 
(via)
Take it to the hilt, Santo.
Michelle Bachmann's got you beat by about six inches.
Previous Great GIFs of the Day:
Inception Cat.
Nobody Fucks with the Jesus.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Shia Fox and Megan LaBeouf.


(via reddit, of course)
Along with cats and porn, celeb mash-ups are why the Internet was invented.

All ad copywriters and art directors are whiny bitches (video).


(via)
Oh, I'm sorry. I meant to say: "ad creatives are the bravest people in the world, fighting like warrior-babies for their creative "children". One of a series of videos promoting the prestigious Dallas ADDYs (even I've won a couple of stupid ADDYs). By TM Advertising. Still, it's better work than this horrible Miami ADDYs video, and this NY ANDYs print ad featuring an anilingus train.

Where's Waldo? Dead, in a Lee jeans ad.

(click)
I don't know anything about it, what it means. But, whenever one does get a glimpse of him, he is always wearing jeans (though, not jorts). Via here. Previously: FOUND HIM!

The GEICO pig needs to be slaughtered.


The first spot—mildly amusing.
The next two spots, including this one—intensely annoying.
This is what happens when you've got to blow a trillion dollar ad budget, somehow.
Now the GEICO Octopus: that's a character I'd like to see in more spots.
Ad agency: The Martin Agency.

Levi's again insults all women size six and up.

(click ad, via)
"ALL shapes and sizes".
Not the first time Levi's has done this. Won't be the last.
So, put on your fuck-me pumps, tie your hair in a ponytail, and hit the goddamn gym, you size six+ fatties. Then, you'll be hot. Then, go buy our jeans.
Marketers and magazines just can't help insulting the shit out of women.
update: women: a male anon commenter doesn't think this ad is insulting to women.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Holy Goddamn Motherfucking Shitballs: a VW bus AT-AT.

(click, via)
Two of the coolest machines in the history of machinery, combined to create a perfect geek storm. My best friend, who works with the homeless in Burlington, VT, drives a classic VW bus (Cleveland Browns colors). He is getting this image, post-haste. Related: Awesome, but sexist, 1960s VW bus ad. Related: Previous many Star Wars ad things.

Santorum "cum blast" headline of the day.

At this point, editors are just fucking with him. Via Buzzfeed.
Previously: Rick wants you to CUM.

Dead, bloodied New York City pay phone of the day.


(click images)
"No dial tone". Yeah, because it's been beaten to death. New York Fucking City: where even the pay phones are tougher than your pansy out-of-town ass. On Third Ave. in the East Village. To keep up with all NYC's abused (and tapped) pay phones, and Gotham street life/art/ephemera, follow New York Shitty.

Hilarious "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks of the Day.

(click, via)
Zombie Cop lives!
Previously in:
Unnecessary Quotation Marks.

The most beautiful print ads ever produced for Greenpeace.



(click ads, via)
The artwork is so good, it brings tears to my eyes. But not as much as the futility of the message: You want me to "become David" against those giant fucking environment killing machines? Look at them! And you're only giving me a tiny slingshot? What weapons do you guys use? Yeah, no: peace out.
Ad agency: DraftFCB Switzerland.
A shit-ton more Greenpeace ads here.

1970s Pink Floyd Dole commercial will make you want to drop acid, eat a banana.


Yes, it's a real spot, featuring "Big Gig in the Sky" from Dark Side of the Moon.
Related: 1970s Cannabis Cologne ad.

Birth Control ads via Colorado will make Rick Santorum's underused penis explode.


(click ads, via) New ads from a statewide effort to reduce unwanted births/promote safe sex via the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment (here's the campaign's website).
Promiscuous sluts! Promiscuous gays! Sex is not for pleasure, sayeth Lord Rick (he truly believes this). Santorum just won the Colorado Caucus, so the ads are sure to get his BVD tighty whities in a bunch (Goddamn Demon-crat governor)—though they're nothing compared to these racy UK safe sex posters, also targeting young adults. Ad agency: Vermilion, Boulder.